Definition of Happiness
by Delenn
Summary: NEW:10-07-03 The definition of happiness doesn't count for the fact that love destroys you while hatred; hatred builds you up and keeps you safe. And in the end, hatred is all we have.


**Disclaimer: All characters from 'Angel the Series' don't belong to me, they belong to whoever created/wrote/owns them. Scene belongs to whoever wrote "White Oleander" and whoever filmed/planned/directed the film. And yes, I am too lazy to look up the names of the people who own them, but I can guarantee it's not me. So, don't sue me please!!! The story idea is mine though, so let's not use it without my permission, m'kay?   
  
Author's Notes: Hey everyone! This is just a little Angel story that up and occurred to me overnight (literally), I wonder why so many of them occur at night? Am I that vampire brainsoaked? Yes, I know that's not a word. So, anyway, I decided to write it!   
  
Spoilers: Absolutely none!   
  
Story Notes: This is short, sweet, and hopefully finished. ;) I never can quite tell if I'll finish something or not. There's no pairings. What can I say, when I mention short, I mean really short. Basically over spring break I watched White Oleander and decided that the part Michelle Phiefer played, was as close to a human Darla as we're ever going to get outside of vampire-ville. Not so fussy for the rest of the movie, but there were a couple scenes I loved, this left me with all sorts of insane ideas. Sadly, whatever I was planning on writing, I got distracted and forgot. Sorry guys! So, I just kind of went with it.   
  
Summary: The definition of happiness doesn't count for the fact that love destroys you while hatred; hatred builds you up and keeps you safe. And in the end, hatred is all we have.   
  
Feedback: Yes! Feed the author, please! Critique/Comments/Enjoyment is greatly appreciated, honestly, just drop me a line! Goddess_Delenn@yahoo.com   
  
Distribution: My site, BFW, and "The Last Time I Saw You: An Angel & Darla Reunion." Everyone else has to ask, all you have to do is click the above link and tell me you want it, I guarantee I'll say yes, you just have to ask first!   
  
Songs For This Fiction: Give me time to think on it.   
  
Warnings: Sex/Language/Violence: Nah.   
  
Pairing: None really.   
  
Rating: Strong PG-13 or 14-A   
  
Date Started/Finished: April 11th, 2003/October 7th, 2003**   
  


* * *

  
  


Definition of Happiness  
By ~Delenn~

  
  
  
  
_"Love humiliates you, hatred cradles you…"_ - White Oleander   
  
There's just something about the whole idea of a curse with a clause that is disturbing. Curses are curses, either they work or they fail, but they are not meant to be removed, ever. But no, this curse has to have a clause.   
  
What is that clause, you ask? Well, of course, it's something ridiculous, something humiliating, something properly confusing as it should be.   
  
One moment of absolute happiness and the whole curse goes poof.   
  
Now the question is, whose happiness, because that's a loaded word. There are millions of definitions of happiness, depending on who you are, what day it is, hell, what the last person that talked to you just said. Anything can change it, so again I ask, whose happiness?   
  
At one point, it was the happiness of the actual curse, the damn soul that had been cursed upon my boy. That happiness was in the form of some stupid mortal. But what can you expect, it's a curse, it doesn't have taste.   
  
Now, I bet the curse couldn't find happiness with her, so you see, it all changes.   
  
Wouldn't you think the *demon* would be the one to have to find happiness? That would be hard for most. Not for me, but that is beside the point. No, what the demon wants doesn't count, has nothing to do with the stupid curse. It could, but it doesn't.   
  
So, the soul gets to decide, well what would really make the soul happy? No demon. Hence the perchance for mortals. But nothing will really get rid of the demon, so then the soul decides maybe he'd be okay if the demon just shut up.   
  
Now the soul, the very instrument of the curse, is unintentionally trying to end the curse to save himself and make the demon happy. This is the very reason witches should be hunted down and killed. They create stupid, elaborate, curses, when a simple, easy to remove one would have been enough.   
  
And this whole idea of love being the key to absolute happiness that's a complete lie; it depends on whose love they're talking about. If they were really talking about the demon, then, well, stupid mortals would have nothing to do with it. No, they're talking about the soul. But wouldn't you think that if the soul had to be uprooted, it would be hatred that did it?   
  
After all, the purpose of the soul was to keep the demon in check, so if the soul could feel perfect hatred, the kind that cradles you until all you want to do is rip that person to pieces, well, that wouldn't have involved cheerleaders either. I inspired love in the demon and hatred in both the demon and the soul, and it should have been enough to undo the curse.   
  
But no, the definition of happiness doesn't count for that. Doesn't count for the fact that love destroys you, makes you a shadow of your former self, willing to do anything to keep that love alive, while hatred, hatred builds you up and keeps you safe. Their definition, whoever they are, includes flimsy whims and fleeting emotions, but not the things that matter.   
  
Some happiness that is, oh well, we'll see how long that lasts the soul. And when it crumbles down, I'll be there, to help the demon get out. Because after all, I hate the soul, and in the end, hatred is all you have.   
  


The End


End file.
